bluegreen17 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bluegreen17) wrote2006-01-01 01:03 pm
bluegreen17) wrote2006-01-01 01:03 pm
a sort of 2005 wrapup/begin the begin
happy new year everyone!
i just wrote an email to my friend patti,whom i met on open diary which i was on before becoming an ljer. we don't have much in common,but she is a wonderful sweet woman who is the same age as i am,and i feel like she is a sister to me. i don't have much in common with some of my sisters,but i love them a lot,and so it is with patti. some of the stuff i wrote to her i thought would be good for post,so here is an abridged version for my lj...
~~~~~~
i was thinking of you and thought i'd write you on this first day of the year. here's wishing it is a really good one for you. every day and every moment is a new beginning,but i think it's nice that there's a holiday that's all about beginnings.
last year was up and down for me. a few fairly minor things happened that were challenging for my ohsosensitive soul to deal with,like having my wonderful therapist move away,and not finding anyone to replace her (but that has a good aspect to it too) and basically no spring and no fall which i missed because those are my favorite seasons and very few of my beloved open-window (not too cold,not too hot) days,and some recurrence of stomach stuff (the upside to that is that i savor chocolate even more than i did,because i don't eat it as much.)
i stopped my wellbutrin in april because i was doing very very well,but after the lack of spring and my therapist moving away,i didn't feel so great. but i didn't want to go back on it unless i felt it was really necessary,and i've managed. and lately i've bounced back and started back with my cognitive and better-thinking stuff which i had learned but then didn't keep up with. i think i'm learning to be nicer to myself,even as i get more wrinkled! i don't mind the eye wrinkles so much...they're kinda cute...but the ones around the mouth...ugh!
i must say i'm pretty indebted to the esther and jerry hicks stuff i've read and tapes i've listened to. i did,however,cut down on my listening of them simply because i do better to remember to listen to my own intuition and use other things i've learned as a supplement,if that makes sense.
it was funny last night because all my coworkers had new year's eve plans and they were talking about them,and i was surprised that i didn't feel too left out as i would have in the past. i actually came home last night and had a cup of soy eggnog,which was yummy,and i watched the first two episodes of 'lost' which i hadn't seen,as i've not really watched it. i got the dvds from the library. it's very intriguing.
this new year's doesn't feel like such a big deal to me,even as i like the holiday. i think it's because i've gotten into the habit of thinking of beginnings as constant,and that makes me feel good.
for instance,the week after christmas is the WORST in my store. all the kids and lots of adults are on vacation,and they come in the store and make a lot of mess,and just hang out for hours! so last week i was pretty cranky,though luckily i only had four days of it,because i had tuesday for my christmas holiday,since christmas fell on my day off. phew! anyway,friday was a really really bad day,but i realized it was only bad because i was frustrated,not because i was depressed,and that's an upgrade! so then i had to laugh at the end of the day,and just start again.
~~~~~
let's begin again
begin the begin
-r.e.m.
i just wrote an email to my friend patti,whom i met on open diary which i was on before becoming an ljer. we don't have much in common,but she is a wonderful sweet woman who is the same age as i am,and i feel like she is a sister to me. i don't have much in common with some of my sisters,but i love them a lot,and so it is with patti. some of the stuff i wrote to her i thought would be good for post,so here is an abridged version for my lj...
~~~~~~
i was thinking of you and thought i'd write you on this first day of the year. here's wishing it is a really good one for you. every day and every moment is a new beginning,but i think it's nice that there's a holiday that's all about beginnings.
last year was up and down for me. a few fairly minor things happened that were challenging for my ohsosensitive soul to deal with,like having my wonderful therapist move away,and not finding anyone to replace her (but that has a good aspect to it too) and basically no spring and no fall which i missed because those are my favorite seasons and very few of my beloved open-window (not too cold,not too hot) days,and some recurrence of stomach stuff (the upside to that is that i savor chocolate even more than i did,because i don't eat it as much.)
i stopped my wellbutrin in april because i was doing very very well,but after the lack of spring and my therapist moving away,i didn't feel so great. but i didn't want to go back on it unless i felt it was really necessary,and i've managed. and lately i've bounced back and started back with my cognitive and better-thinking stuff which i had learned but then didn't keep up with. i think i'm learning to be nicer to myself,even as i get more wrinkled! i don't mind the eye wrinkles so much...they're kinda cute...but the ones around the mouth...ugh!
i must say i'm pretty indebted to the esther and jerry hicks stuff i've read and tapes i've listened to. i did,however,cut down on my listening of them simply because i do better to remember to listen to my own intuition and use other things i've learned as a supplement,if that makes sense.
it was funny last night because all my coworkers had new year's eve plans and they were talking about them,and i was surprised that i didn't feel too left out as i would have in the past. i actually came home last night and had a cup of soy eggnog,which was yummy,and i watched the first two episodes of 'lost' which i hadn't seen,as i've not really watched it. i got the dvds from the library. it's very intriguing.
this new year's doesn't feel like such a big deal to me,even as i like the holiday. i think it's because i've gotten into the habit of thinking of beginnings as constant,and that makes me feel good.
for instance,the week after christmas is the WORST in my store. all the kids and lots of adults are on vacation,and they come in the store and make a lot of mess,and just hang out for hours! so last week i was pretty cranky,though luckily i only had four days of it,because i had tuesday for my christmas holiday,since christmas fell on my day off. phew! anyway,friday was a really really bad day,but i realized it was only bad because i was frustrated,not because i was depressed,and that's an upgrade! so then i had to laugh at the end of the day,and just start again.
~~~~~
let's begin again
begin the begin
-r.e.m.
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