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[bluegreen17]

if i'm never tied to anything,i'll never be free.
-'finale' from the musical 'pippin'

Comments

[gerry.livejournal.com]

you did ask me if i ever have tried to help myself with some kind of cognitive therapie...i dont know what exactly you understand under that term...but i think i had my experinces with this kind of therapie, but i did it formy own

once, many years ago, i worked with affirmations....every day in the morning and in the evening, i wrote the affirmations on paper, cause writing is more efficient then only reading...the effect was immense for some time. I frelt very good in work and was more initiative and had more
self confidence and said my opinion more freely....then after three or for weeks i got more and more carelessly with writing the affirmations and after a certain time i did fall back in old paterns. My coworkers told me, that my behavior had changed to more communicative and more initiative and more joyously and they asked me what has happened.....

Later i have read in other books, that it will be at least a good experience to try to change the behavior with mental techniques cause one can experience that the attitude of thinking is only a habit and that one can change this habit, can turn it into another habit, but it is always habit.

for me it was a funy experience, but i always was sceptical, cause i didn't want really to change myself on a so mechanically way, on a verbal level. All depends then on words. The experience showed me how dependet i was on words and justiifications.


Another cognitiv method i have read babout is from Dr. Albert Ellis, and i find it very genial, i have tried a bit with that method in younger years, then i stopped it cause i didnt have succes and it was not so easy like writing the affirmations.
I have bought a book from Albert Ellis a xear ago, and i liketo read what he says: His main message is: irrational beliefes about ourselves and the world influence and help maintain emotional disturbances and how can i change this irrational beliefes.... i find his thoughts very clear and he had a lot of succes in treating klients with that method..the method is called: Rational-Emotive -Therapy

As a young man i have read B. Skinners book : Beyond good and bad...and i had started to try to change my unwanted behaviors with his methods of making contracts with onelself and then give oneself reward if one fulfills the contract...i dont like that method, it may be good for dogs and cats, it sustains our wishes to make us to a robot and not to be a living thing

and of course i did read a lot of books from that Murphy, who wrotes about the power of the unconsciuos and i did try me with declaim positiv sentences to influence my unconcious..but this method had no effect forme


the best effect as said, I had with writing affirmations....
first the positiv, and then the immediate negativ answer of the mind to that positiv affirmaiton and then strike back to that negativ reaction. Every affirmation three times a day in three forms: it went like taht

1.positiv affirmation
i, gerry am a worthwile human beeing.

negativ answer: oh my dear you really believe that, you make jokes.

strike back: oh no my dear,you err.

.........

i, gerry am a worthwile human being

oh gerry forget it.

Say what you want,i am a worthwile human being, that's it.

..........

i, gerry am a worthwile human being

you really believe that you can change anything with that stupid writing

honey i like your voice, but you will ose the fight

and so on and so on

[bluegreen17]

good thoughts. thanks. i have read a bit by albert ellis. he talks about using distractions. my problem is that i distract myself most of the time and rarely face and deal with things! that's probably not his whole philosophy but that's the bit i remember about it.

the writing exercise sounds like it would be really good. like talking back to yourself and shaking up your faulty thinking.

thanks for your thoughts on that.
di