bluegreen17 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bluegreen17) wrote2004-03-30 10:36 am
bluegreen17) wrote2004-03-30 10:36 am
safety pins,b-52's,ya-yas,heroes and mom
where do i buy safety pins? what dept. would i look in a store? oh,probably the 'domestics' with the materials,eh?
depends where i go. answering my own question. i don't have a safety pin in the house. not that i can find anyway.
having a b-52's kind of morning,which is like the polar opposite of,say,a joy division kind of morning. in other words,way better than usual.
our thoughts are traveling faster
moving beyond the heavens above
last night i watched the divine secrets of the ya-ya sisterhood,which i borrowed from the library along with m*a*s*h (the movie,which i've never seen),and gandhi,which is always an inspiration,and of course appropriate to now as i'm studying india and hinduism. i think gandhi is probably my top personal saint/role model. or at least,in my top ten. hmmmm,what would my top ten be? ah,i'm too lazy to think about it,and it's kind of sad that most people i admire are men,but it's not intentionally to leave out the women.
okay,in no particular order,some of my inspirations are:
einstein
harpo marx
gandhi
st.anthony (well,honestly,he always helps me find things)
st. francis (not for his asceticism and self-loathing,but for his love of animals. and for the prayer he inspired)
woody allen (not for his possible unhealthy obsessions,but for his humor and his movies...i love his books!)
this is getting pretty random. there must be some woman i admire.
speaking of women,thinking about my mom and me,i told her today(if she can hear me) that she did a really good job of putting up with the strange and wonderful creature that i am. i don't know if i scared her because i was too much like her real self or because i am nothing like her. recently,our uncle mentioned that she was very strong-willed and independent when she was younger. i never saw my mom that way,but i get described that way myself. hmmmm. anyway,when i thought that, i thought i heard a voice say back to me 'well,you did a pretty good job of putting up with me too'. well,maybe we didn't do so bad with each other,and just loving each other in spite of our differences was something both of us needed to do. who knows for sure?
i think there's a lot more things i need to understand about my mother and maybe just getting older myself will help me to understand. and when i do understand,i think my mom will be one of my inspirations too. in fact,i think i AM inspired by the fact that
she did as much for me,who scared her,as she could. that took courage and love,which she had bucketloads of. okay,well,that's good to realize,and a good use of my talent for rumination.
that movie made me cry,of course,because there's a mother and daughter relationship at its core,and it made me realize how young our parents are when they are raising us.
the thing that got me the most was when the father said to his daughter,
"it's never too late". with my mom gone,isn't it too late? then again,maybe not.
depends where i go. answering my own question. i don't have a safety pin in the house. not that i can find anyway.
having a b-52's kind of morning,which is like the polar opposite of,say,a joy division kind of morning. in other words,way better than usual.
our thoughts are traveling faster
moving beyond the heavens above
last night i watched the divine secrets of the ya-ya sisterhood,which i borrowed from the library along with m*a*s*h (the movie,which i've never seen),and gandhi,which is always an inspiration,and of course appropriate to now as i'm studying india and hinduism. i think gandhi is probably my top personal saint/role model. or at least,in my top ten. hmmmm,what would my top ten be? ah,i'm too lazy to think about it,and it's kind of sad that most people i admire are men,but it's not intentionally to leave out the women.
okay,in no particular order,some of my inspirations are:
einstein
harpo marx
gandhi
st.anthony (well,honestly,he always helps me find things)
st. francis (not for his asceticism and self-loathing,but for his love of animals. and for the prayer he inspired)
woody allen (not for his possible unhealthy obsessions,but for his humor and his movies...i love his books!)
this is getting pretty random. there must be some woman i admire.
speaking of women,thinking about my mom and me,i told her today(if she can hear me) that she did a really good job of putting up with the strange and wonderful creature that i am. i don't know if i scared her because i was too much like her real self or because i am nothing like her. recently,our uncle mentioned that she was very strong-willed and independent when she was younger. i never saw my mom that way,but i get described that way myself. hmmmm. anyway,when i thought that, i thought i heard a voice say back to me 'well,you did a pretty good job of putting up with me too'. well,maybe we didn't do so bad with each other,and just loving each other in spite of our differences was something both of us needed to do. who knows for sure?
i think there's a lot more things i need to understand about my mother and maybe just getting older myself will help me to understand. and when i do understand,i think my mom will be one of my inspirations too. in fact,i think i AM inspired by the fact that
she did as much for me,who scared her,as she could. that took courage and love,which she had bucketloads of. okay,well,that's good to realize,and a good use of my talent for rumination.
that movie made me cry,of course,because there's a mother and daughter relationship at its core,and it made me realize how young our parents are when they are raising us.
the thing that got me the most was when the father said to his daughter,
"it's never too late". with my mom gone,isn't it too late? then again,maybe not.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2004-04-01 05:09 am (UTC)(link)i think if i didn't want so many things and could be happy with what i have instead, i'd be a lot better off. but if we don't want or dream...that seems so closed and final to me.
patti
no subject
(Anonymous) 2004-04-01 05:12 am (UTC)(link)patti
no subject
(Anonymous) 2004-04-01 05:14 am (UTC)(link)patti
p.s.
i have to do it again to leave this one too! :oP
How did I ...
So Mom's talking back to you now, huh? Mostly she just advises me in domesticity, such as "Wipe out the sink!" Quite profound really. :D I have yet to have a normal dream of her. When I dream of her, she's still sick. Rachel dreamt of her the week before she died, and in it Mom said to Rachel "You don't know what's best for me!" That stuck with me. I saw Ya-Ya, but didn't think much of it.
...a good use of my talent for rumination
Rumination is certainly a talent! See how wise you are (when you ramble)?
Here's a Baby Larry for your viewing pleasure.
untitled comment
...not see this post before? I just see it here now!
i didn't filter it or anything earlier,if that's what you're insinuating.
heh.
So Mom's talking back to you now, huh?
mom always said i had a good imagination,but some folks think the things we imagine are actually true in some way,so...who knows? i think jean houston said something like that. those things that pop into our heads must come from somewhere,right? things can be true without being literally true,since literally means by the word,and words are only symbols--signposts pointing the way...tell that to those who take the bible literally,though...
baby larry! got any edges?
Re: untitled comment
And trust me, I believe you! When Mom got sick, she stopped helping me domestically, but ever since she passed away, I remember precise directions on how best to iron a shirt! :D I went to th cemetery today. Michele left roses for Mom and some for Aunt Rachel and Uncle Norm. I noticed Mom's Dad's birthday was March 14th...2 days after she passed away. Do you happen to know the date of Deenie's death? It's not on the prayer card.
if you want to sing out,sing out...
that was really nice of michele.she makes me 'look bad'. hell,everyone makes me 'look bad'-i'm so inadequate in so many things.yeah,i'm having one of those milliseconds...no,really,it was very sweet. i'm sure mom was 'tickled pink'. maybe i'll have to leave her a pinwheel...that would be a typical gift from me,wouldn't it? maybe i'll do that on memorial day...that will make mom laugh,and i was always pretty good at making mom laugh!
aunt rachel and uncle norm are way the heck on the other side...it's a good place to get exercise,isn't it?
wow,i didn't know grandfather sam's birthday was march 14th. that is really quite interesting. she got there for his birthday...
oh,and deenie died in 1976,didn't she? because i think you were about a year old.
anyway,reminiscing about deaths...ha.kind of a harold and maude thing to do.
thanks for the icon offer. actually,i don't really feel a need for an edge icon,just thought you might have one since you were making u2 ones.i want to save up my icon requests for something i really like,because i don't want to be a pest.
Re: if you want to sing out,sing out...
17 was my best year, so it's apparently NOT a family curse.
A pinwheel would be a cute and apt tribute. If it wasn't so rainy, I'd leave a chirping chick! :D
Uncle Henry is indeed only a stone's throw from Mom. I checked on everyone except Aunt G. 'cuz I can never find her. Aunt Azilda is right behind Mom, two stones back. I don't remember her though. She died in 1984, but we must not have been close because I don't recall her at all, yet I remember Aunt Albertine who died in '82 I think.
Deenie died in 1976, and Pepere in 1977.
Re: if you want to sing out,sing out...
aunt g. is giggling because we can't find her. she always loved pranks.
no,we weren't close to aunt azilda,for some reason.i don't even remember deenie or aunt g or aunt a. being close to her. i think she was a bit older than deenie,but i could be wrong. nope,i just looked it up on my fading copy of the genealogy. deenie was the third daughter. first was anaisse,then corinne,who died as a baby.then deenie,and then azilda a year later. azilda was maurice and rita's mother.
aunt albertine was quite a character. she and uncle ernest used to fight a lot,though i think it was pretty goodnaturedly! what do you remember about her? i used to take her out once in a while...she ate like a bird. and then she'd feed me ice cream...she lived like on the 14th floor or something,which kind of spooked me,because i'm not fond of heights!
i think maybe i'm going to look for a gandhi picture for an icon...
Re: if you want to sing out,sing out...
Anyway, I visited Mom's parents a lot when she was sick. Michele and I noticed yesterday that there's a tree stump right near where Mom and her Dad are buried. It's a tree that must have been cut down years and years and years ago so as not to interfere with the burial plot, but...we NEVER noticed it before. And yes, I think Aunt G. moves her stone on occasion. She's playing Where's Waldo with me.
Next time I go though, I'll bring flowers for Aunt G. and Uncle Ernest, who is with her now. I like knowing they're all together, both physically and spiritually. It's easy to "visit" them all this way.
PS