friends lists,part deux

[bluegreen17]

my last post and responses have triggered further thoughts on this subject.

i suppose it depends on what one wants. i want to be entertained and to entertain. well,that's not quite the right word. i like to learn and i like to pass along what i've learned to others. i like to make people laugh and be amused by others. i like to inspire...i think that's what i like most of all,and i don't know if i do that much,but i think i do occasionally and i like to inspire. i like to look at beautiful things and i like to share what i think is beautiful,though i don't have a computer so i can't include images,only link to them.i like to know what books,music,movies,tv etc. that others are enjoying and talk about what i like. in that respect,my journal type is not the most common...it has become more about ideas,and i look for other journals that tend to contain ideas. of course,many journals are a combination of things.

i would wish that people wouldn't take it personally when deleted from a friends list...it's really a reading list,which does not exclude friendship,however. well,at least that is what it is for me. i am sensitive to the fact that some people feel hurt by having someone no longer keep them on their reading list,but i can't control how others react,though i do suggest they not take it personally.

i wouldn't want someone to keep me on their friends list out of pity and not really want to read my stuff. so if anyone has done that,feel free to delete me anytime. i'm looking for exchanges of ideas and that doesn't always exclude daily happenings...i just like what i like. and i'm fickle and mercurial...i change a lot.

also,while on the topic,just so those who are on my friends list know,i often read and don't comment. the reason i don't comment is i make a decision of whether my comment is useful or interesting,and if not,i don't leave one. i've been thinking about this lately though...sometimes just saying 'i agree' or 'that's interesting' or whatever can be good just to let someone know you're reading even if you DON'T have much to say.i haven't decided,and i guess i do that on a case-by-case basis...

Comments

[solarfields.livejournal.com]

Although I know my worth does not depend on getting comments, that my journal is still worthwhile when no one comments, it's still nice to get them. Sometimes the quiet is unsettling.

[alabastard.livejournal.com]

Good thoughts ... I love to share ideas, thoughts, theories, but I use this journal for many purposes, one being to keep up with fiends in my often busy whirlwind, let them know what I'm up to and thinking, and glean the same from theirs ... my journals is a window to me, though nothing specific, it is what I make it every time I enter.

[jayteeone.livejournal.com]

I like the I agree or interesting comment. At least you know you're not talking to the air around you. *HUGS*

[gurdonark.livejournal.com]

I think that different folks have different goals and purposes for LJ, but ultimately, each person has to use it in his or her own way, trying to be as kind as possible in doing so, but otherwise, just using the reading list in the way the individual user wants.

Friends lists and such...

[allogenes.livejournal.com]

Nice to know you may still be reading my journal! :-) (That was a joke! I'm not this insecure! Really!)

I think most of the people I've met here are in agreement on the point that the name "friends list" is a bad choice. Too many people take it personally. They should be called watch lists or something...and they should be separated from the system of controlling who has permission to read your journal.

Just out of curiosity, have you considered using friends groups (sublists) to allow you to read what you like while leaving people on the main list? The reason I ask is that if you drop someone it can screw up reading permissions on their posts if they take offense and drop you too...and it stops them from reading any of your friends-only posts.

Ok...that was a long rambling reply probably mostly due to the fact that I have been thinking about this stuff lately, too!

Re: Friends lists and such...

[bluegreen17]

i sometimes do use filters for reading,but i also just want to make my overall list smaller. i wish this sort of thing didn't have a tendency to turn into an issue. i feel like a bit of a jerk just for stating my opinion on that,because i'm really not an unkind person but at the same time i get annoyed when i have to use the 'kid-gloves'. ah,well. it's nothing earth-shattering.

Re: Friends lists and such...

[allogenes.livejournal.com]

Just out of curiosity, why do you want a smaller list? Just too much to read? (I know that feeling sometimes.)

But you definitely should not feel bad for stating your opinion. I sometimes think there is a little too much 'drama' here at LJ. It may be a function of the average age of LJ users. :-) (Of course, that is the sort of comment that has gotten me in trouble before.)