bluegreen17 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bluegreen17) wrote2002-09-16 12:35 am
bluegreen17) wrote2002-09-16 12:35 am
planet of mathoms
i think i need to take a break from reading self-help stuff and just go for pure escapism. i'm already all the way to page 6 of the fellowship of the ring! that's pretty good because i get bored and distracted really easily. anyway,the hobbits have a cool word...mathom...which they use 'for anything which the Hobbits have no immediate use for,but were unwillingly to throw away'.
dang,i got an apartment full of mathoms and in fact our planet is jam packed with the stuff!
speaking of math,if i recall correctly (and that's debatable with an old lady like me),it was our geometry teacher who got us hooked on the tolkien books back in '74 i think...that and earth shoes. and this guy had a cool handheld gadget called a calculator so you didn't have to figure out everything the long way. well,we read the tolkien books and bought the earth shoes,but none of us in high school got calculators.
well,because i like having a selection to choose from (im restless if you hadn't noticed,especially mentally) i may go to the library tomorrow and look for some escapist reading material.
maybe even one of those fluffy romances...i read about one a decade,all about heaving breasts,pulsating thighs and throbbing....oh,never mind. the other day george mentioned that wellbutrin increases your libido and i said,yeah i know,i love it!
this is probably one more strange thing about me,but i am just as happy channeling that sexual energy into just general wellbeing. i just enjoy it. which is probably just as well since i'm as single as a buddhist nun most of the time.
does that make me selfish that i'm fussy who i share that energy with?
i'll probably check out the kids and young adults fantasy sections. so much of the adult fantasy stuff looks rather dreadful.i do think tolkien spoiled me,all those years ago. i may check out another madeleine l'engle. i reread a wrinkle in time a couple of years ago and especially loved how she ended it...it was very meaningful to me.
and at the opposite end of the spectrum,godwise,is philip pullman. there's an article about him in the latest vanity fair which i've read half of (it's in my pile at work).
he did a signing here last year and let me just say he's not the warm fuzzy type. one sweet guy is tomie de paola,but my favorite writer that's signed here was bill bryson. it's especially great because i've loved his books for years and he is so funny. and he did a signing in our store,and though i'm rather shy in some situations,i really did want to speak to him,so i told him i especially loved his chapter on the i.r.s. in 'i'm a stranger here myself'...god,it's sidesplittingly funny. i almost died laughing reading it out loud to my mom. he said a sincere thanks and he thanked all of us for doing whatever we do,and he was really really nice.i always like to tell people what a great guy he is.
anyway,back to philip pullman. well,i take it he's an atheist and perhaps a humanist,judging by the dark materials trilogy and some articles i've read.i only read the subtle knife,and he is a really wonderful writer, and i'm very fussy. however,i don't know if i agree with his conclusions in those books,from the synopsis i read of the last book. i like that he's antireligion but i don't like that he seems to be anti-god. i don't think i could be humanist,because they seem to believe that humans are the pinnacle of evolution,and egads,i think mankind is barbaric in general. i read a column about 9/11 and the writer said that it was a really hard thing for atheists to cope with,since they put all their hope in humanity.
where am i going with this?
well,if there is not something grander than human beings than i think we're doomed.there are some wonderful humans and i will tell you something...
i've mentioned before that i wished i could cry more often,but the one thing that makes me cry the most is reading or observing acts of kindness. that touches me so much i can cry like a baby. one time a few years ago i was going through yet another of my really hard times. and the guy who worked in the shop next door to us and who i got along with well,just walked by and patted me on the shoulder in a friendly gesture and i almost burst into tears right there. i was in a bad situation at work where i ended up being the scapegoat ('you're dangerous 'cause your honest'...this has happened to me a couple of times in dysfunctional work situations...i point them out,people don't want to hear it,and YOU are the problem....kind of sounds like my family situation) and just having someone sincerely be kind to me was such a help that day.i didn't burst into tears,because that would have embarrassed him,and i don't think he ever knew what a kind thing he had done in that small friendly gesture.
i also cry to see others pain,more so than my own. because in a cosmic view,all pain is my own. but i cry for myself last of all,and that may be part of my problems...i dont' take care of myself very well.
i think humans have potential and sometimes show it,but as a species we have a long long way to go and much to learn. but what do i know? (shhh....i'm not from around here...diane calling orson,come in orson...)
i can really relate to how 'man' is portrayed in lord of the rings...so corruptible and yet...potential. the elves seems rather snooty to me now,but i must read further.and the hobbits are the zen masters! or the tao of bilbo? the hobbits seem the purest of heart.
dang,i got an apartment full of mathoms and in fact our planet is jam packed with the stuff!
speaking of math,if i recall correctly (and that's debatable with an old lady like me),it was our geometry teacher who got us hooked on the tolkien books back in '74 i think...that and earth shoes. and this guy had a cool handheld gadget called a calculator so you didn't have to figure out everything the long way. well,we read the tolkien books and bought the earth shoes,but none of us in high school got calculators.
well,because i like having a selection to choose from (im restless if you hadn't noticed,especially mentally) i may go to the library tomorrow and look for some escapist reading material.
maybe even one of those fluffy romances...i read about one a decade,all about heaving breasts,pulsating thighs and throbbing....oh,never mind. the other day george mentioned that wellbutrin increases your libido and i said,yeah i know,i love it!
this is probably one more strange thing about me,but i am just as happy channeling that sexual energy into just general wellbeing. i just enjoy it. which is probably just as well since i'm as single as a buddhist nun most of the time.
does that make me selfish that i'm fussy who i share that energy with?
i'll probably check out the kids and young adults fantasy sections. so much of the adult fantasy stuff looks rather dreadful.i do think tolkien spoiled me,all those years ago. i may check out another madeleine l'engle. i reread a wrinkle in time a couple of years ago and especially loved how she ended it...it was very meaningful to me.
and at the opposite end of the spectrum,godwise,is philip pullman. there's an article about him in the latest vanity fair which i've read half of (it's in my pile at work).
he did a signing here last year and let me just say he's not the warm fuzzy type. one sweet guy is tomie de paola,but my favorite writer that's signed here was bill bryson. it's especially great because i've loved his books for years and he is so funny. and he did a signing in our store,and though i'm rather shy in some situations,i really did want to speak to him,so i told him i especially loved his chapter on the i.r.s. in 'i'm a stranger here myself'...god,it's sidesplittingly funny. i almost died laughing reading it out loud to my mom. he said a sincere thanks and he thanked all of us for doing whatever we do,and he was really really nice.i always like to tell people what a great guy he is.
anyway,back to philip pullman. well,i take it he's an atheist and perhaps a humanist,judging by the dark materials trilogy and some articles i've read.i only read the subtle knife,and he is a really wonderful writer, and i'm very fussy. however,i don't know if i agree with his conclusions in those books,from the synopsis i read of the last book. i like that he's antireligion but i don't like that he seems to be anti-god. i don't think i could be humanist,because they seem to believe that humans are the pinnacle of evolution,and egads,i think mankind is barbaric in general. i read a column about 9/11 and the writer said that it was a really hard thing for atheists to cope with,since they put all their hope in humanity.
where am i going with this?
well,if there is not something grander than human beings than i think we're doomed.there are some wonderful humans and i will tell you something...
i've mentioned before that i wished i could cry more often,but the one thing that makes me cry the most is reading or observing acts of kindness. that touches me so much i can cry like a baby. one time a few years ago i was going through yet another of my really hard times. and the guy who worked in the shop next door to us and who i got along with well,just walked by and patted me on the shoulder in a friendly gesture and i almost burst into tears right there. i was in a bad situation at work where i ended up being the scapegoat ('you're dangerous 'cause your honest'...this has happened to me a couple of times in dysfunctional work situations...i point them out,people don't want to hear it,and YOU are the problem....kind of sounds like my family situation) and just having someone sincerely be kind to me was such a help that day.i didn't burst into tears,because that would have embarrassed him,and i don't think he ever knew what a kind thing he had done in that small friendly gesture.
i also cry to see others pain,more so than my own. because in a cosmic view,all pain is my own. but i cry for myself last of all,and that may be part of my problems...i dont' take care of myself very well.
i think humans have potential and sometimes show it,but as a species we have a long long way to go and much to learn. but what do i know? (shhh....i'm not from around here...diane calling orson,come in orson...)
i can really relate to how 'man' is portrayed in lord of the rings...so corruptible and yet...potential. the elves seems rather snooty to me now,but i must read further.and the hobbits are the zen masters! or the tao of bilbo? the hobbits seem the purest of heart.
no subject