the lost weekend

[bluegreen17]

and i don't even drink. i do however,take a drug,and sleep a lot and do the sugar thing. last week i was stressed trying to get my food stamps and medicare premium payment back after i told them i was getting money from my dad's estate that was going right so into a health trust. which shouldn't have meant i lost my benefits,but anyway,just to keep life interesting...i had my appointment to set up the trust on friday,and went to bed at around 2am saturday morning,which is pretty normal for me. and then proceeded to sleep for about 18 hours. had some interesting dreams too,in which my deceased mom resurrected again (this happens regularly in my dreams) and then said goodbye and re-died by first turning from color to black and white and then vanishing. still processing my relationship with mom after eight years of her being gone,but this felt better.

got up at 830PM then,and ate and goofed off and then did some laundry while we lost an hour,and i went to bed at the new daylight savings time of 5am which means i was awake for about seven hours. but i did a load of laundry so good for me! couldn't really sleep this morning,so i got up at 9am and went back to bed at noon and slept until almost 7pm. now it's 1am again so who knows what happens next but i got stuff to do on monday. so yeah,lost weekend!

Comments

[zoe-1418.livejournal.com]

Seems like you must have needed the sleep, one way or another!

Fascinating about the color-to-B&W-to-vanishing of your mother in the dream. Maybe she is indeed becoming less dramatically influential? Thanks for your comments on my post, btw.

[bluegreen17]

my sleeping is really crazy in its frequency. i think this is the most intense time of year for it for me. i like to think i'm shamanic journeying so it's not a total waste of time. who knows,i may be right. i feel like i learn something.