bluegreen17 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bluegreen17) wrote2003-02-09 12:54 am
bluegreen17) wrote2003-02-09 12:54 am
invading relatives and a bumper slicer
well,let's see. mom wanted to come here (where she used to live) but once she got here,she didnt seem to want to do anything,so i don't know why she wanted to come over.(she has dementia and has a hard time thinking and communicating,etc) we thought she might want to sort through some stuff.
so my sisters sorted through some stuff while they were here which helps me since it'll be less i'll have to do later. mom was poking around through everything,including my stuff. so as a joke,since everyone had invaded and was poking around MY apartment,i said 'okay,but just don't eat my bananas'. well,five minutes later,mom giggles and walks over to the bowl of bananas and rips one off...and i yelled at her in a mock tirade. i said,okay,but just keep out of my figs! my mom loves bananas,so i shouldn't have been surprised.
and i got hit by an suv in the parking lot of the store i work at today. i have no idea why this woman was backing up,but her tailpipe sliced a quarter moon in the metal of my bumper. she was sincerely apologetic,which was good because i can't remember ever being so angry. (i hate people and i especially hate the way they drive,so this really pushed my nuclear (or is that nukelar?) buttons! she said she had a hard time seeing out the back window of her suv,and i thought,hmmm...that's not good.
other than that,things were okay and i ate two much sugar as usual.
i dug up a copy of mel ash's 'zen of recovery' which i bought mostly because i like his books but i really need to do something about using sugar as an added medication. ( i take wellbutrin because i'd been seriously depressed for quite some time,and it does help quite a bit,but i still feel sad a lot of the time,and sugar does make me feel better. i used to love how caffeine made me feel too,but i can't have that anymore because of stomach problems. anyway...)
and am i ever glad it's the weekend for me now! wheee!!! i have sunday and monday 'off'...from my paying job anyway.i hope i can get a haircut on monday too because my shaggy hair is driving me nuts.
well,since i ate a bunch of those sugary fruit candies when i got home from work,i gotta go brush and floss now. oh,and do my dishes from lunch. the thrills never end.
so my sisters sorted through some stuff while they were here which helps me since it'll be less i'll have to do later. mom was poking around through everything,including my stuff. so as a joke,since everyone had invaded and was poking around MY apartment,i said 'okay,but just don't eat my bananas'. well,five minutes later,mom giggles and walks over to the bowl of bananas and rips one off...and i yelled at her in a mock tirade. i said,okay,but just keep out of my figs! my mom loves bananas,so i shouldn't have been surprised.
and i got hit by an suv in the parking lot of the store i work at today. i have no idea why this woman was backing up,but her tailpipe sliced a quarter moon in the metal of my bumper. she was sincerely apologetic,which was good because i can't remember ever being so angry. (i hate people and i especially hate the way they drive,so this really pushed my nuclear (or is that nukelar?) buttons! she said she had a hard time seeing out the back window of her suv,and i thought,hmmm...that's not good.
other than that,things were okay and i ate two much sugar as usual.
i dug up a copy of mel ash's 'zen of recovery' which i bought mostly because i like his books but i really need to do something about using sugar as an added medication. ( i take wellbutrin because i'd been seriously depressed for quite some time,and it does help quite a bit,but i still feel sad a lot of the time,and sugar does make me feel better. i used to love how caffeine made me feel too,but i can't have that anymore because of stomach problems. anyway...)
and am i ever glad it's the weekend for me now! wheee!!! i have sunday and monday 'off'...from my paying job anyway.i hope i can get a haircut on monday too because my shaggy hair is driving me nuts.
well,since i ate a bunch of those sugary fruit candies when i got home from work,i gotta go brush and floss now. oh,and do my dishes from lunch. the thrills never end.
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anyway,just lately i've looked more into the twelve steps stuff. because i definitely have some willpower which is how i lost a lot of weight and have kept it off for over ten years. and how i can go out to eat with people and watch them eat stuff i shouldn't eat and eat the stuff i should when i want THAT stuff. but my willpower has it's limits,and i've not had luck cutting down on sugar and chocolate. it might seem laughable,but in enough quantity it's really not good for you. anyhow...
one thing about the 12 steps that's a bit of a stumbling block....some days i don't believe in ANY higher power other than a typhoon etc...i.e.mother nature...and obviously that's a higher power that certainly isn't benevolent. so i wonder what athiests in 12 step programs do. do you know and if so would you care to share? i WANT to believe in a higher power but sometimes i just can't if that makes any sense.
anyway,perhaps this is addressed in mel ash's book. see,i'm jumping the gun. i know enough about buddhism to know that athiests can practice it since buddhists don't all believe in god.
okay,time for lunch. i'll eat the healthy stuff and then proceed to eat the sugar. ha.
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Anyways Im rambling. I hope you have a marvelous weekend and get a cute haircut that will perk you up. And damn them SUVs!
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ooh,sorry about your son and the fight and the hospital.as if one of those isnt bad enough...but both! sorry to hear about the sucky day there.
it's a shock to find out life isn't fair isn't it? i still can't adjust to how much rudeness there is in the world either. maybe i'm just living in the wrong place. i never thought new englanders were so nasty when i was growing up.
ah,well. i hope your day is better today!