eeyore and tigger

'And the truth is, when the ADD adult does join conversations, she often finds herself bored by the minute attention others devote to subjects that to her seem to skim only the surface of life.'
-gabor mate,in -scattered-

bingo.
i read this because part of the book is available online. now i am definitely going to seek out a copy of this book.

amazingly enough,i had several pleasant conversations this evening while at work,and even one interesting one! wow.

for some reason people were very talkative today and i found myself not minding engaging in a bit of chitchat which i usually dont bother with because it bores me. i felt a little more tolerant of boredom today,and therefore i was more sociable. it felt great. later on george asked me how my evening was going and i said 'pretty good' and he mentioned that the moon was in gemini.
i have noticed in the past that when the moon is in gemini people are more talkative and i'm in a better mood. in general,i'm pretty skeptical of astrology these days,but i have made that observation.

of course i'm a gemini myself as is my friend sean (his birthday is the day after mine). sean stopped by to pick up his paycheck and we got to talking about his current favorite novelist,henry james,and some other interesting things. i love talking about stuff like that.

so even though i went off to work feeling like eeyore,i came home feeling more like tigger.i love it when that happens.

it also occurred to me that i require outside help to feel happy most of the time,and that's one sure way to stay on the wheel of torture...which is why i borrowed a copy of 'the power of now' by eckhart tolle because i think in the long run,even if i do take a detour and take drugs to help me feel better and more focused and get some things accomplished, there's got to be a larger answer to get beyond suffering...if it's possible.and buddhists and others say that it IS possible...

well,we'll see.

old lady sees tangerine sky

back to being eeyorey.
oh,well,at least tigger times are a little vacation.
the sky is weirdly orangey yellow today.it makes me think of supposedly weird colors that the sky is before a tornado,but there isn't even a thunderstorm in the forecast.anyway,it is all clouded over but that's okay because it's fairly cool and not too humid,to my surprise and delight.

my stomach isn't very happy today.probably because i ate a lot of sugar yesterday and had chocolate the day before. i'm pretty tired of eating the same boring foods and i'm tired of denying myself a daily dose of chocolate. maybe if i manage to get myself to a psychiatrist and can get some stimulant medication...dexedrine is what i want to try--i wont feel the need to eat so much sugar in an attempt to get a good chocolate-like improvement in my mood.maybe. i'm having a hard time motivating myself to make an appointment because for one thing i don't know whom to choose,and secondly all the psychiatrists are in the city and i don't feel like driving into the city on my day off. and the other thing is when am i going to have the time to do this?

my legs are hurting again today. i didn't take my bromelain pills yesterday and maybe that's why. the bromelain is a natural remedy made from pineapple and it helps with swelling if taken between meals. (if you take it with meals,it acts like a digestive aid,but doesn't help the swellling.) bromelain is expensive and of course since it's a natural remedy my insurance won't pay for it. another happy fact in my life.

on the plus side,i was able to sleep with the window open last night as it was pleasantly cool and i still have the window open today. tomorrow will probably be a closed up cooped up day though because it's supposed to be up around the nineties.

i desperately want a ben and jerry's and i'm not even pmsing. i'm just depressed.

well it could be worse i suppose.ha.

(no subject)

well,that's fortunate,since i don't have one. but what if i want one? well,i guess that's a different matter...